It comes in cycles

So I put up a new blog, write a few posts, and then disappear for a while. Le sigh.

I’ve actually been pretty busy with work, and when I get busy with a project or set of projects that actually interest me, they tend to take all my time up because I don’t want to work on anything else. That’s fine for the project, its not fine for the two dozen other projects and responsibilities I have going at any one time. Oh well. That’s my feeble excuse for nothing being around the blog much.

But really, I’ve long noticed that my sex drive works in cycles. For a few weeks it’ll be really high, and all I can think about is getting tied up, flogged, beaten, collared, fucked, and otherwise abused. Then the cycle will drop and I’ll have very little interest in porn, jacking off, hooking up, or anything. It’s not just dirty sex – even regular sex at home is this way. I dunno what it is.

But in the dearth of blogging I haven’t completely been sexless. I had a really fun couple of evenings on a business trip to Nashville where I got tied up for the first time, tortured with wax for the first time (by someone else) in forever, gagged on a cock and got better at sucking one, and got milked something fierce – no small feat for my super-tight and anxious asshole.

What was nice about that guy – and I’ll do a proper recounting at some point – is that he’s a nice guy. Sure he’s crazy, and has an animalistic sex drive, and scared me a little, but he’s also nice and actually wanted to teach me stuff, not just get his own rocks off. I’ve met another guy recently who’s similar – we didn’t even play at all – and it’s just a good feeling to know there are sane brotherly types out there to learn from.

Anyway, back to work, now. I’ll try and be better about posting. 🙂

Quick Update: I thought about this post a little more today and I wanted to clarify that it’s only my attention that waxes and wanes, not my identity. More and more every day I understand my inclination as a sub, as a boy, and the role that part of my identity plays.  It’s a part of me, not just some fly-by-night kink that I play with on occasion. My sex drive just cycles at times, kink and vanilla included. I have a lot of different interests and projects and obsessions, they can’t all get the same attention at the same time or I’d never get anything done.

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